10 Absolutes

Alzheimer care is never a cookie cutter solution. Each person is so individual that care must be individual as well. I gave a talk at an Alzheimer Partnershiip Conference in Burlington, MA yesterday. I was purusing the various vendor tables and spied a paper put out by Your Elder Experts, a program of JF&CS. It was called 10 Absolutes for Alzheimer Caregiving. Ah, so there are some absolutes in this disease! I can honestly say I agree with these 10 absolutes. They are: Never argue--> agree,
Never reason--> divert, Never shame--> distract, Never remember--> reminisce, Never say"I told you"--> repeat, Never say "You can't--> Say "do what you can", Never command or demand--> ask or model, Never condescent--> encourage and/or praise, and Never force--> reinforce. I'm not sure what that last one means; perhaps reinforce you wanting them to come with you rather than forcing it as a command. These suggestions are just good kind respectful ways to work with a person with cognitive challenges. I guess I'd add a few: never say 'no', never ask, "Do you remember?", and say "I care about you." a lot.